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Should the opportunity arise, lesbians should definitely join these contests – they’re all a shoo in to win!

Other lesbian contests are a bit boring and a tad too traditional. This set is sure to be much much more exciting and fun:

Lesbian contest, anyone?

1. Longest Breath Held – Lesbians are used to shutting their traps for long periods of time due to *cough* practice in deep-sea diving. If all lesbians would hold their breaths together, the world oxygen supply can replenish itself by as much as 50%. Come on lesbians, join this contest whenever you can! A variation would be the longes “Happy Birthday to youuuuu” in birthday parties…

2. Tofu Eating Contests – Ah. Lesbians and tofu. Its a wonderful combination. Statistics report that over 50% of tofu consumption come from our dear health-crazed, green-chomping lesbians.

Are the tofu chips on the menu? Beancurd party? Invite all the ladies and even make a competition out of it! Its a sure hit.

3. Longest Monologue – Lesbians love to talk. Gender forum here, Lesbian Art dialogue there, its girls talking about girls everywhere!

Give a lesbian a mic stand and a captive audience and they can beat Jay Leno in talking their way through the night any day.

4. Most amount of time lingering before a first kiss – Around and around. Lesbians tend to go round and round before making the first move. Let alone a first kiss.

I’m talking about a loong dinner, a loong movie and a loong sofa conversation before a girl finally sums up the courage to hold the other girl’s hand. And a 2nd to 3rd date before the actual kiss happens.

I’m kidding.

Not. This actually happens, contrary to L world scenes.

Maybe we should do a global foreplay contest where lesbians can definitely win.

5. Most number of documentaries watched in a lifetime – The Wilson Cycle of Supercontinent Formation, Uncut. Feminist Theories in the 19th century: Director’s Take. Behind the Scenes: The Blossoming Cherries of Japan.

Name it and any lesbian will probably watch it. 80% of the female audience of National Geographic are in it for seeing other girls, and scouting if a lot of animals are gay, too.

Do you have anything to add to this lesbian contest list?

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